sweet ass whips!

Take most people, they're crazy about cars. They worry if they get a little scratch on them, and they're always talking about how many miles they get to a gallon, and if they get a brand-new car already they start thinking about trading it in for one that's even newer. I don't even like old cars. I mean they don't even interest me. I'd rather have a goddam horse. A horse is at least human, for God's sake. ~J.D. Salinger, Catcher in the Rye

So, Joel has become fixated on driving. While I understand this need, or urge, he refuses to listen to us on the issues of how expensive owning a car is, how he is not going to be able to park downtown when he goes to work for 15 hours a day, how if he does he is going to get parking tickets and boots, and that the beauty of living downtown is not having to drive. But, he's never had a license, and for those of you that know about the debacle with the car and tickets in Raleigh know we're not starting with a clean slate here.

The short version of the story is this: At the start, Joel informed us he wanted to purchase a "sweet ass whip*," and I, probably because I'm so old, had no idea what that meant. Since then, I have had multiple "sweet ass whips" pointed out to me on the road, so I now have a better understanding. Unfortunately Joel is unable to afford said sweet ass whip, since he will be spending about $200 a month on car insurance. Joel decided to compromise his lofty goals of purchasing the 1992 Lexus on craiglist for $1500 (engine not included) and agree to a more reasonable solution. My dad (thank heavens for him) is selling Joel his old car. It's a 1998 Ford Explorer, but it's in good shape both mechanically and physically, and will be something reliable and safe he can drive.

In the state of SC, you cannot get a driver's license unless you have an active insurance policy, regardless of if you own a vehicle or not. So, Joel is going to have to fork over the money to activate the insurance to get the license--and if he fails the test, he's wasted that money. As I am quickly discovering, though, convincing a 19 year old that they don't know everything is quite a tough feat. Joel is certain, although coming from NC, that he knows the SC laws, can pass the test, and his ability to "sort of parallel park" will serve him well enough. The catch? He needs US to take him to the DMV to take his test.

One condition of Joel moving here with us was to get his GED. While his class has been cancelled a few times, he has not been doing any studying on his own, regardless of the extensive suggestions Brandan and I have given him. After a talk with my mom (mom is always right), she suggested we find out what means something to him, and use it as an incentive. So, the plan is this: Get your GED, and I'll take you to get your driver's license. On a smaller scale, finish those 4 pages of math problems, and I'll take you outside and teach you how to parallel park for an hour. We know that (despite Joel's refusals) that the minute he gets that car and license, he's gone. Studying is going to be out of the picture. So I told him I'm holding the car, and not taking him to take his driver's test, until he gets the GED.

It's tough, because we're not Joel's parents. But we moved Joel here with us, and he has no one else to provide him guidance and keep him on track. At first I felt like I couldn't say things like, "you can't have your license until you get your GED," because that's such a parent thing to say. But I'm quickly realizing that Joel still needs these kind of boundaries and goals set for him, and we're the only people who are going to do it. He makes poor decisions because he doesn't have the knowledge to make good ones, and it's up to Brandan and I to educate him about how the real world works, so that when the time comes, he can make the right choice on his own.

*"Whip"-When the steering wheel was first put into use in automobiles, it was called the "whip". The whip is what you used to control the horses on a stagecoach, hence the analogy. Many years later, various hip hop artists noticed that the Mercedes-Benz logo resembled a steering wheel. They then proceeded to use the old term "whip" to describe any Mercedes-Benz vehicle. The term has now been generalized to classify any expensive automobile.
Source: www.urbandictionary.com